RIP Ernest: A Quiet, Sweet, Loving Soul and Beautiful Teacher

Ernest was a beautiful little white cat (with a bit of grey marking on his head) who arrived at BARC Shelter some months ago.  He had been living at a gas station, and the situation there had not been good.

But whatever abuse or hard times he may have endured from his life there and/or on the street or elsewhere, he had such a gentle, sweet, affectionate and trusting disposition.  It never ceases to amaze me how many animals can be so kind and forgiving, even if their previous experience was incredibly harsh.

Though according to the vets Ernest was not an old cat, he had the vibe of a sweet older gentleman, so polite and gentle.  He was adopted fairly quickly, but was soon returned as he was peeing all over the house and it was found that he had very serious underlying problems that had not been detected at the shelter since he had been peeing in the box and acting ok at that time.  It turned out that he had a malformed kidney, possibly due to eating antifreeze while he was living at the gas station.  He had other issues as well, most likely connected with the kidney problem.
We were all really concerned when he returned to the shelter.  He was very pulled in, and really did not look well at all.  He was not moving much and kept his beautiful light blue eyes closed most of the time.  We did not know if he would even live a few more days.

BARC began to give him intensive treatment of fluids and medication, and of course he received a huge amount of love from all the volunteers and staff.  Anyone who had contact with him was moved by his sweet and gentle spirit.  I began to give him regular Reiki treatments, which he really responded to, laying into my hands.  I could feel a lot of heat particularly in his lower body, where the chakra relating to the kidneys is.  I would imagine him filled with white, healing light.

Over the past few months since he returned to the shelter he had a comeback, gaining some weight, eating well, and enjoying the affection and attention which was showered on him.
When he had first returned to the shelter, I would often find him hunkered down in his litter box.  But during the course of our session, he would come out of the litter box and make his way to the front of the cage.

After some time, he began to come right to the front of the cage, his eyes open and looking at me.  He would give me head butts (sometimes keeping his head there for a bit and we just felt the connection) and lay right into my hands and arms for Reiki.  There was such a wistfulness, such a sweetness and a sadness and a joy all mixed into one that I felt in our sessions.  I could feel him connecting to the light.  I could feel us enveloped with and becoming one with the light and the energy.  I could feel us becoming one with the love that filled that light and energy.  Time truly suspends in those beautiful moments.

I think, because he had shown so much improvement for a while, we were surprised when suddenly last week he began to look and feel ill again.  I was hoping that maybe this was a temporary setback, but sadly, the dear kitty took a turn for the worse and the shelter people and vets determined that it was the kindest thing to let him go. Strange coincidence, I had come upon a photo of me with him and put it as my profile photo on facebook a few days earlier - perhaps I knew on a deeper level that this was coming.

I was so sad not to be able to say goodbye to him in person, but grateful that I had had one last session with him before he went. I am so sad that he was not able to be on the earth longer, but am so grateful I had the chance to know him and to have such special moments with him.

And of course I still can connect with him now.  Right now I am telling him how much he is loved, what a special creature he is, and how sorry I am that he had to go so soon.  I am telling him that he touched so many lives with his sweet soul.  And that he will always be in my heart, surrounded with love and light, such a sweet little angel.  And I am thanking him for reminding me to slow down and enjoy the moment, to feel the light and the love around us, to have gratitude for all of this.

Thank you dear Ernest, and thank you, dear BARC people, for all the love and care that you showed this special being.  xoxoxoxox

The Power of Love, and Learning to Let Go: Berry, RIP

It is always so difficult to say goodbye to an animal friend, and even harder to figure out how to write about it and how to write about the power of that connection, a connection that exists far beyond the physical body.
Berry's heart and mine are inextricably intertwined.  I know that we learned so much from each other, about love, about trust, and about letting go.

Berry arrived at BARC Shelter the day before Hurricane Sandy hit.  She had been rescued from the same back yard as my cats Natalia and Lulu (I often referred to her as their sister), and it was evident from that first day that she was feral and, if anything, even more fearful than my cats. She was put at a cage way in the back of the shelter where she would have more privacy and would have a chance to calm down.  She was originally named Barracuda - a name which I refused to call her, so I soon decided her name was Berry, and others at the shelter began to call her that so that was the name that stuck.

 Above, before and after: Berry when she first arrived at shelter, and then about a year later.

As you can see from the "before" picture on the left, Berry was initially very distrustful of any human being.  She was fearful and angry, lashing out at anyone who opened her cage.
However, I always felt that with faith, love, patience and positive energy, this could change. 
I began by simply sending her Reiki from outside her closed cage.  I also spoke to her a bit, but very softly.  I did this for several sessions, then I decided to see if I could touch her with a back scratcher, which would give her a lot of space.  I just did one or two TTouches on the top of her head, then closed the cage and gave her a break.  I continued doing this over the next sessions and one day she began to push back up against the back scratcher.  It was then that I knew we were making progress and that I had felt that opening, that opening where our energies and our hearts could meet.
Over the next days, weeks, months, we made steady progress.  I made sure to just go a little at a time with her, and we kept moving forward.  She started to be comfortable eating from her bowl, which was at the front of the cage, while I was TTouching her with the back scratcher.  So it wasn't too long after that before I started to be able to touch her a bit directly with my hands.

I was feeling she was actually enjoying the contact more and more, and she started responding to me when I would walk back towards her cage and call her name.  She would look up and start to come towards me. And over time, she would actually come trotting to the front when she saw me and I called her name.
As time went on, I was able to have more and more contact with her, and I showed a few of the other seasoned volunteers how to do TTouches with her gently with the back scratcher, so that she could slowly get used to other people having contact with her.  And she slowly became comfortable with that.  When someone came to the cage with the green plastic back scratcher, she knew that they were going to gently stroke her with that and that was something she enjoyed. 
As the time passed, Berry was not only transforming behaviorally but physically. As the beauty of her true personality came forth, it manifested itself in her physical appearance as well.  A couple of people who came into the shelter who had not seen her for some months did not recognize her as the same cat!
She had also had an awful problem with what initially seemed like a constant cold, but later was found to be a nasal polyp, so once that was removed, she seemed to feel a lot better.  And that was great to see.
Berry and I were so close, our hearts so connected.  I know that she trusted me.  Even when she was more comfortable with me, I would go slowly, not wanting to frighten her or overwhelm her, wanting to be respectful of her.  We knew each other's energies so well.  I would connect with her with Reiki and TTouch and we felt like one being, merging in a flow of light.

Recently, I wanted to get to another level with her, and so I started luring her onto my lap with treats.  She took to this very well and one day she came completely out on my lap, which you see in the photo.  First she had put two paws on my lap, then three, then there she was, sitting on my lap!

She was a bit startled at first, but it was understandable.  She was realizing that there were cages and animals above her, and was seeing all around and feeling the concept of that openness all around her.
I saw her look above and around, and it was such a beautiful feeling - I felt it too, her having that feeling of the world expanding, opening up.  The open air, outside the bars of the cage.  I wanted to stay in that moment with her forever, her on my lap, feeling completely connected with her like one being, in that moment.  Feeling that expanse, that openness, like we were surrounded in light together.
A week ago, when she turned around I noticed a huge raw sore on her back, and also noticed her pulling at her skin other places.  It looked bad and I was disturbed by seeing this, so I told the shelter people right away and they were going to have her looked at.  It actually brought to mind my first cat, Timmy, who had surgery for breast cancer and was ok for a good while after that but then began breaking out in skin lesions.  But at the time I wasn't thinking that Berry had anything life-threatening going on.
So it was such a shock when I got a call from the shelter that the vet had looked at Berry and found that she had a huge mass, which was moving up towards her lungs, and as a result had euthanized her.  Apparently she had also gotten weak and was not breathing well.
It was so hard to hear this, to accept this.  That this creature who had been alive, active, seeming to feel ok just a few days ago had been so ill??  I consulted my dear friend and colleague, animal communicator Eileen Garfinkel (http://dreamsofamelia.com) to see what we could learn from Berry.
Apparently Berry had hidden her illness.  She didn't want me to know how sick she was, she knew how stressed it would make me.  Berry wanted me not to be sad, she wanted me to know that she was fine, she was at peace now.  That I helped her to be ready to transition.  That she knew how much I loved her, that I had given her so much pleasant time, that I had helped her to change deeply, at a molecular level, and that I was her person.
I miss her so much, but she is still with me, curled up inside my heart. And I thank her for teaching me so much about the power of positive energy, the power of unconditional love, the power of appreciating the moment, and about how to let go.
And thank you to my dear BARC friends for all the kindness you showed her.
xxoo
(please feel free to read more about my work with Berry, type in "Berry" on the Lijit Search on the right hand side of my blog and the links will appear)

Cookie and Oreo: Dancing to the End of the Song

The last part of an animal's journey with us on earth can be a stressful time, but it can also be a beautiful time of connection, feeling and learning how to truly be in the moment with our animals.

I met my friend Cookie McCrory through the main TTouch office and subsequent to that, gave her private TTouch lessons, as well as doing a workshop which she coordinated with the Homeless Cat Network, where she volunteers.  Though we live on opposite coasts, we are always in touch, and share what is going on with us with our animal and human families.  And as I have family out west, I do try to come to the Bay Area several times a year, if possible.

I knew her dear kitty Oreo was very sick.  She had spoken of him often to me, as he loved TTouch so much.  And I was very touched when she sent me the following letter.  With the permission of Cookie and those addressed in the letter, I share this loving tribute:

 





Above:  Cookie with Oreo: "Do you want TTouch, Oreo?"

 

(The people referenced in Cookie's letter are Tom Wilson, who teaches Animal Hospice, Dancing to the end of the song. Kathleen Prasad and Leah D'Ambrosio taught Reiki to Cookie.  They are from SARA (Shelter Animal Reiki Association), Kathleen is the founder, Leah is co-founder. Cookie took Ttouch Mini Class with me several times.:) )
 

Hi Tom, Leah, Kathleen and Sarah, I wanted to share the beautiful passing of my beloved Oreo on to his next journey. I took your hospice class last year, Dancing till the end of the song........

My beloved Oreo was 14 years. We were told he had kidney failure, three months ago. At that time, I reread my class notes on your Hospice class I took. Your class enabled my Oreo and me to enjoy the past three months together and to help us get ready for his next journey. I told him stories each day of our life together, how I found him so scared, no mama and only 6 weeks, all the exciting events we shared...........up today. What wonderful life we had together......... It took almost 2 years for him to trust me. I found him in a fishing net dying at 6 weeks.

We enjoyed Ttouch and Animal Reiki daily. We danced each day to soft music or hula, as my hips swayed he would make happy feet on my shoulders. We sat on the big comfy computer chair in the sun, opened the window and welcomed the fresh air daily. I opt for no fluids, I  wasn't going to chase him daily and confine him in a wrapped towel. He has always been a free spirit ............

"My husband talking story with our Oreo, Hawaiian style"

 

He was my buddy, the  only one that saw the tears in my eyes and pain in my heart, as my husband battles bone cancer daily. I 'd pick up my Oreo and the pain would disappear, while doing Animal Reiki.. My heart was full of warmth and it came from my Oreo. He looked forward to TTouch throughout the day, I would  just put my hand over his head and his eyes said, "let's do it"!  TTouch brought comfort to him, he was ever so relaxed.........Animal Reiki was welcomed am & pm, especially the chanting, as I chant with my hula. My chants come from my soul. Oreo embraced Animal Reiki, it opened our communication so clearly, he shared that he was okay and that he would be leaving me soon. He was more concerned about me. He taught me it was okay to let go. He would see me when I cross over. When I start my Animal Reiki, his paw would reach out to me, instead of comforting him, he comforted me. He gave me such inner peace. My little warrior.
My vet tech Karen came to my house a couple times a week, to check on him. Sometimes she gave him laser treatment, it made him feel so much better.
He slept in my bed nightly when he became ill. How strange, he knew I needed him, he taught me so much.

"Pastor Elizabeth Blessed our Oreo"

He was blessed by an animal minister I know, that does the Blessing of the Animals. She blessed all my indoor cats and outdoor ferals.
My family and friends came to visit him and wish him well and it was beautiful, not sad.........We were supported with love from everyone. Sat. am he took a turn for the worse, I looked into his eyes and they told me it was time to let him go.......I didn't acknowledge him. Then at 2:00 am, he stood up on me and urinated  on me.  I smiled and told him, that's okay.  ( I'll never forget that moment and he made me smile ) It was like, I told you I was ready to go and you didn't listen to me. You got it now! : )  I cleaned up everything and we spent the night in the bathroom. That am he started to have trembles, I called my vet tech and she came over. She gave him something to relax him. I picked up my love and we danced to the soft chants, till the end of the last song forever. We went to say farewell to the house cats and our two outdoor ferals in the backyard. He had lost the shine in his eyes, didn't want to eat now. I cuddled him in my arms and hummed Hawaiian songs to him. I told him Sugar baby and other furry friends were waiting for him across the Rainbow Bridge. It was okay for him to go, that I will be okay. He  passed  peacefully in my gentle arms.............I was so happy for him he had peace and so did I.
Karen asked if I wanted to spend more time with him. I told her with a smile, we've had 14 wonderful years together and the last 3 months were the best. It was time for him to go on his next journey. His friends are waiting for him. Sugarbaby was at the gate to greet him. I saw him as clear as day. He's the greeter at the Rainbow Bridge.
Thank you for sharing Hospice with me . I'd like to learn more to share with others. Oreo had taught me so much about life, I deeply thank him. Animal Reiki gave us the strength to be as one in his last 3 three months of his journey. TTouch calmed him down and helped soothed any pain that came that way. TTouch has been a part of his daily life for many years. When my friends came over to visit. I would put my hand over his head and he would push it gently, as he loved Ttouch. My friends were amazed.
I was blessed to share Animal Reiki, Ttouch and Hospice with him.
My many friends could not believe how calm and happy I was to be on his journey with him. I shared, it is all about opening your heart and listening to the animal.  When one can learn to be one with their pet, there is an unbelievable communication bond that will take place and it will touch your warm heart.

All of you taught me how to celebrate life and death...................thank you. I must share all of this with my friends and help them, when needed.
                                                 Mahalo nui loa,  Cookie 

 

 

 

                      Reiki is with me all the time. It has brought me inner peace. It helps me daily as my husband battles cancer, accepting what is and enjoying the moment...................... I am Blessed.
                         

Monk: R.I.P.: Love, Reiki, and Letting Go

 

Last Friday, I said goodbye to my dear Reiki kitty friend, Monk.

I shared many Reiki sessions with Monk since early July, as he had Chronic Renal Failure.  I had worked with him prior to this diagnosis as well.  He always enjoyed Reiki, and anticipated it more and more as he got to know me.  When he saw me, he would go jump on the bed to get ready to settle in for his session, often sitting on his person Suzanne's lap for the session.

Late May, Suzanne had called me to cat sit for Monk and his cat girlfriend Jade, and when I saw Monk, I felt so strongly that I wanted to help.  I could see that due to the kidney disease, Monk’s appetite and life force were rapidly diminishing.  I had such a strong sense that Reiki would be of help to him, not to mention that I already had a very strong bond with Monk.  So I began to do Reiki sessions with him very often - every day at times, but at least three to four times a week. 

I felt the sessions needed to be often, to continually reinforce the balance, peacefulness and sense of well-being that Reiki can bring.

We quickly saw his appetite improve from nearly zero to nearly normal, he began clearly enjoying his food again, and his energy level and general vitality improved a lot as well.  I always offer Reiki energy for the highest good, but one can never know exactly how that will play itself out. 

I was so happy to see him feeling better for what seemed to be extra time, time which we had not anticipated him having, time which I know that we all cherished him having, especially his beloved owner Suzanne.  It was such a delight to see the light back in his eyes, to see him prance along with a spring in his step, to see him comfortable and to see him with an appetite.

Monk adored his owner Suzanne, and I felt him wanting to hang on to life as long as he could. And I am glad that until last week sometime, he really was hanging in there strongly, as strongly as he could, Even though his body was frail, I felt such a strength of spirit, of love, of determination.

I treasured the sessions I spent with him.  I will never forget them.  The lovely summer days with him on my lap as I sat on the terrace with the breeze blowing, and later with him curled up on my lapas we sat on the couch.  I knew that I was walking with him on the last part of his road in this life, and it was an honor to be able to spend this time with this very special creature, to feel the very deep connection that happens with Reiki energy with him, to share the light with him.  He had such a pure heart, such pure sweetness about him.  Most often, it felt like my heart was merging with his heart, that our breathing became as one creature, that we were together in the emanating light.  And this emanating light felt like emanating, healing love, like the most pure, beautiful feeling of love that one could have for another creature.

After we began doing more of the sessions inside, sometimes Jade would curl up right next to Monk, and they would take in the energy together.

Last Wednesday, when I arrived, I felt from Monk such a strong feeling.  It was a lovely day with the sun streaming in through the window, a fall day that gives you that rather melancholy feeling of the summer ending and fall beginning. 

It was as if he were laying outside in the sun, temperature just warm and so perfect that he didn't want to move.  That he knew he would have to go soon, but he wanted to stay a little longer, a little longer.  A little longer to feel this beautiful time on earth.  That he knew his time to go was soon, but he wasn't just quite ready, that he so wanted to enjoy it a while longer.  To feel the connection with the earth, with me in the moment as my hands emanated warmth and energy, with his kitty friend Jade nearby, and most of all with his person Suzanne, who, though she was not present in body during the session, she was and is always with him. 

I felt so sad knowing that his time was near, that our time together on the earthly plane would not be much longer. 

When I left, I made sure he was comfortable, curled up on this lovely shaggy pillow, as though it were a soft form of grass that was all around him.

Thursday he settled into my lap, and it took him a while to get comfortable but then he got so comfortable there, connected with the flow of the energy.  After the session ended, I very gently placed him in one of his cozy places. 

Friday I arrived at Suzanne's place a couple of hours before the vet and his assistant were to come.  As sad as this was, this was a special and powerful time of connection with both Monk and Suzanne.  She held him gently on her lap for most of the time, while I kept the Reiki energy flowing.  I felt him become more at ease as we sat there.  So much love and light surrounded him.

I kept imagining him resting in a field of grass, and then running in a field of grass, with sunlight around him. 

A very unexpected thing happened then.  The first four or five lines of the 23rd psalm came to me, in bits and pieces.  I think it was because I was see the green pastures, then the still waters, then "he restoreth my soul".  I grew up Episcopalian, but do not really follow any particular organized religion - I am a spiritual person and keep myself open to whatever rings true to me.  But at this moment, the bits and pieces of these lines and the images especially, the feeling of being out in the grass with Monk, the feeling of the soul being restored, it all felt very healing.  I let the images and lines flow through my mind, which eventually led to the image of light all around the three of us, a calm, healing, heavenly light.  We had very quiet music playing, and the door was open to the terrace, with fresh air coming in. 

At the end, he was surrounded by such loving energy, it felt like the most gentle, peaceful exit that he could have.  Much gratitude to the kind and respectful vet and his assistant who were present and helped make this transition so gentle.  And the utmost gratitude to Suzanne, for taking Monk in as a kitten and for giving him such love and care for his whole life.  Much, much love to Monk, to Suzanne, and to Jade.  And all my sympathy.  It is such an honor to know you all and to have been a part of your lives.

There is something that I often say to an animal when I am working with him or her, and I usually say it silently.  This is something I said often to Monk (and still say in my mind), "I love you so much, and I always will."  With those words I feel that the feeling travels over time and space, a love that exists eternally.  Animals help remind us of the feeling of that love with no boundaries, that we can be connected forever no matter whether on the earthly plane or not. 

xoxoxo with love and gratitude to Monk, Suzanne, and Jade

Appreciating the Moment with Monk: Comfort, Peace, and Optimal Balance for Chronic Renal Failure, Part Two

I have been even busier than usual, so it's been hard to squeeze in time to write! 

I had been out of town for about a week after my first few sessions with him and at that point was not sure whether he would pass while I was gone, especially as his person Suzanne had texted me that he was not eating much while I was gone. 

Fortunately Monk was here on earth and ready to resume his sessions when I returned.  I have been working with him at least several times a week, sometimes more.  Since my previous post, his energy and appetite have continued to improve, which is great.  He is still a frail cat, but his life force energy feels so much stronger since I began to work with him.  And he really seems to enjoy his food, which is a huge change.  I am so happy that Suzanne is able to have more time with him.  She and Monk are so deeply connected, and have such a sweet bond with each other.

It also is interesting to see how things are evolving with his general habits.  When I first began to work with him, he wanted to be out on the terrace 24/7, but in the couple of weeks or so he has been content to be inside more of the time.  Of course, some of that is influenced by the weather, as we have been having some tropical-like rainstorms, but his need to be outside doesn't seem urgent as it was with him initially. 

He seems to really welcome my visits, and settles into the Reiki sessions with me very quickly now.  Sometimes we are completely hands-on, other times I need to have my hands maybe about 6 inches or sometimes more off his body.  I always follow his cue as to what he would like.  Quite often he will settle right in my lap or with his head resting on my leg or hand.  It feels that as we go, his body trusts me more and more, so that the energy is absorbed in an increasingly deep way. 

During a Reiki session, when things are really flowing, it feels as if my energy merges with that of the animal.  Sometimes it is as though my hands are actually inside of the animal. 

I use a lot of positive visualization at the same time I am offering him Reiki energy.  Lately, it seems his skin is irritated or itchy, as he is pulling off chunks of fur.  Apparently this is something that can happen with cats with Chronic Renal Failure.  So I imagine cool blue energy soothing his body.  I imagine I'm inside of his skin, and am feeling comfortable inside of the skin, feeling a coolness soothing from the head down to the feet.  I imagine relaxation, and see his fur growing back in the areas where he has pulled the fur off. 

I also do TTouches with him which feel like they should be soothing.  I do little hair slides going down his body, using a light touch.  I also do abalone TTouches, which are TTouches using the whole hand, to try to calm the whole body. 

Another interesting aspect of working inside with Monk is that his cat "sister" Jade is around him more and Reiki seems to be helping them to have some peaceful moments of connection.  Often Jade will curl up right next to where we are working. 

There is something so special about my time with Monk.  He is a dear, gentle little soul.  I know that I am traveling with him on this last part of his road on earth, realizing that we don't know how short or long it will be.  I appreciate these sweet times of love and connection with him.  When I work with him I feel there is light all around us, that we are sharing our hearts.  I am so honored to have these moments with this sweet being.

Quiet Moments Near the End of the Road: Pallino

Hi folks, this one doesn't have any photos, as I wanted to share what my impression of this cat was, who had such a beautiful spirit.  He arrived at the shelter with advanced kidney issues, and recently we had to say goodbye to him.  I will always remember his gentle, sweet nature, so filled with gratitude.

Please read more about him and my experience with him on the post I wrote on my art blog:

http://sarahhauserart.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-power-of-simplicity-pencil-ink-and.html

RIP, sweet kitty.  You were very loved.  And thank you to all the people at BARC who help the animals every day and make it a beautiful place for me to volunteer.

Yankee, RIP

I am constantly reminded of how special BARC shelter in Brooklyn really is.  The people who run it have huge hearts and open their hearts and doors to so many animals who would not have a chance otherwise.

Yankee was a sweet dog who arrived at BARC Shelter around last July. He stayed up in the Cat Loft (the place where I volunteer at BARC) at BARC along with the cats, a few other smaller dogs, two pigeons and Marsha the chicken.  So I had the honor and pleasure of getting to know him.

He was unable to use his front legs, apparently because he had been left for a long time with the legs tied together.  He also had a problem with his heart. 
Yet, though he had been through so much, he had such an amazing and sweet spirit that he touched all who knew him.  The staff and volunteers at the shelter spent a lot of time with him and gave him so much love.  Donations made it possible to get him a special wheelchair so it was easier for him to get around.  He could really speed around on the wheelchair, and it took pressure off the rest of his body which was trying to compensate for the front legs not working.  He generally seemed very chipper when he was in the wheelchair.
Below: Yankee in his wheelchair

Several months after he arrived, a little white poodle named Rain arrived at the shelter.  Rain is unable to use her back legs, as she was bred too many times.  Yet Rain has a sweet and spunky spirit and manages to get around very well despite her condition. 
It didn't take too long before these two animals became inextricably connected with each other, and they were near each other all the time. 


Below: Rain with Yankee

Recently, Yankee's health began to decline.  He seemed to start having more stomach upsets, and not long after that, he got kennel cough, which was very hard for him on top of his other issues.
Rain was right at his side the whole time. And Marsha the chicken, who often hung out near Yankee and Rain, often also would sat next to them at this point too, as if she knew that Yankee was not well.

Below, Yankee in the middle, Rain upper right and Marsha lower left.

And of course, the BARC staff and volunteers, who always gave much love and care to Yankee, spent time with him. During most of Yankee's time there, Colin was the Cat Loft person and did so much to help Yankee feel comfortable and happy, as well as loved.  And when Jayne took over his position recently, she did all she could as well.  And of course BARC gave him the medical care he needed, but finally there was not much more that they could do. 
During Yankee's time at the shelter, I had done quite a few TTouch or Reiki sessions with Yankee, during which time I would usually have Rain on my lap.  And when his health began to take a nose dive, I did a couple of extra-long Reiki sessions with him at that time.  I could feel he was having a very rough time of it.  His breathing was getting labored and I could feel his life force was diminishing.  But I did feel that in the moment the Reiki energy relaxed his body so that I could feel him breathing more deeply than he had before, and I could feel him really absorbing the energy.  Last Friday, when I left, though I knew he was in rough condition, he did seem more peaceful to me.  Of course, my wishful thinking was hoping somehow he could get through this.....
Saturday when I arrived at the shelter, I heard that Tony and Vinny, the shelter owners, had taken Yankee and Rain to their apartment.  And at about 2:30, sadly we were informed that Yankee had passed on. 
Everyone was so so sad, this was a huge loss.This small dog was such a huge presence in the shelter and in everyone's hearts.  And of course for Rain and some of the other animals who were close to him, it will be a huge adjustment and certainly a grieving period. 
However, of course, there was relief as well, knowing that he was no longer in pain and discomfort.  I picture him running effortlessly, with all four legs going and his ears flying in the wind. 
Thank you Yankee, for teaching us all so much about love, forgiveness and strength of spirit.  You gave us all so much.  And thank you to all who did so much for this sweet creature.

Quinn, R,I.P.

(Above:  the green plastic you see on the right is a back scratcher.  Sometimes I would initiate contact with the back of the hand of the back scratcher, and, if he was comfortable, I would then transition to using my hand.)

I feel honored to work with animals every day, and each one has so much to teach me.  But it is a particularly special honor when an animal who is generally too frightened of humans to connect with them feels comfortable enough to let me into their world.

Quinn was a beautiful cat at BARC Shelter.  He was dumped at the shelter some time ago.  Like many of the animals at the shelter, we didn't know exactly what his past was, but he was extremely frightened of people.  I worked with him very gradually, just a little bit at a time.  Most often I used tools such as paintbrushes, feathers, back scratchers and the like in order to connect with him, but there were times when he was comfortable with me touching him directly. 

I found that underneath his often gruff exterior (most often he would meow and swat at an approaching hand) was a gentle, very sensitive soul.  When we connected in our very quiet way, I felt so honored that he trusted me enough to make that connection. 
I would feel the connection even if we weren't literally making contact.  If he did not seem in the mood to be touched, I would often sit outside his cage and send him Reiki energy from there, and I would feel him respond, relaxing and curling up to take a Reiki nap. 
Below, you see me TTouching him using the back of my hand, which is more gentle and less threatening than the front surface of the hand.

I showed some of the other regular volunteers how they could touch him gently with tools, so that he could feel safe, but could have contact. 

As time went on, when I would sit down next to his cage (I would put a chair sideways to his cage, as the sideways orientation is much less intense than straight-on), he would come right up to the front of the cage to greet me.  A few times I thought he was almost considering stepping onto my lap!

I grew to have a very special bond with this cat, who to me seemed like his heart had been wounded. We were able to enter a very quiet, peaceful space together, and I appreciate every moment we spent together.  He taught me so much about being patient and truly in the moment, and always being respectful of what felt safe and comfortable for him in that moment.

The BARC staff and volunteers were very kind to and respectful of him, as they are to all the animals there, and I send them so many thanks for that.  

Sadly, recently Quinn's health suddenly declined sharply, and too soon came his time to cross the rainbow bridge.  I'm sorry I did not have an opportunity to say goodbye to him in person, but I have spoken to him and said goodbye to him in my mind.  He will always live in a very special, quiet place in my heart.  Quinn, I have so much to thank you for and send so much love to you.  I picture you in a beautiful place in the spirit world, curling up on a cozy pillow in the sun for a pleasant nap.  xo

Dusty: R.I.P.

Dusty was brought into BARC Shelter some months back. He was returned after being in a home for ten years, apparently because he was urinating outside of the litter box (to my knowledge, that didn't happen in the shelter). He was given medical attention, great food and treats and an incredible amount of love and care from the BARC staff, vets and volunteers.

From the first day he was brought into the shelter, he was one of the most loving beings I have known, with a heart constantly emanating love and reaching out to share it. He was always ready to come out on a lap for cuddles, and in my case, for Reiki and TTouch as well. I felt him to be a very deep soul, and there was something that felt otherworldly as well, as though he was a sweet angel that had come to earth for a short while. As much as people gave to him, he gave back three times as much in pure love and light.

As time went on, it was clear that his health was waning, and so I began to spend even more time with him than before, feeling him absorbing the Reiki energy from my hands into his body, stretching out and letting go, feeling my being merging with his as the energy flowed.
The shelter people and vets did what they could to help him with medication, fluids, diet, etc. Though he rallied for a while, the past week or so he began to take a nose dive. Yesterday when I was at the shelter I spent a couple of hours with him on my lap, the warmth from my hands being absorbed into his body. I shared Reiki energy with him and did gentle TTouches going down his body, feeling him r-eI spoke to him softly and told him that it would be all right, that I knew he was trying to stay for the benefit of all the people who loved him, but that it was ok for him to let go. At one point he completely stretched out on my lap, laying his head down, some of his energy starting to let go. I knew he was tired, and his time was soon.

Later on that day the decision was made to let him go. Everyone was so sad, but knew it was his time, and was the right thing to do. We all said goodbye to him, and let him know he would be able to be at peace now. I pictured him with light and angels all around him, a bright, warm light.

Thank you Dusty, for being the selfless, generous, beautiful being you were and are, you will live forever in my heart. And thank you to all the BARC staff, vet staff, and volunteers for giving so much love and care to him. xoxoxo

Reiki at BARC Shelter: Adele: RIP

Adele was a gentle, sweet lady - one of the most unassuming beings I have met. Her owners had moved away, and she arrived at BARC many months ago at 15 years old and with a number of health challenges: hyperthyroidism, kidney problems, and possibly a tumor. She was kept in as good condition as possible with medication, hydration, monitoring of her food intake, etc. She was well-taken care of by BARC staff, vets and vet staff, and BARC volunteers. She was much-loved by everyone and I would often arrive at the shelter to see her on someone's lap.

She touched my heart so deeply, this beautiful, graceful soul who was so grateful for every bit of attention she got. Sometimes she would show her gratitude in such sweet, gentle ways: extending a paw, sometimes putting both paws up on my chest, and occasionally she would do a little "circus cat" move where she would put both paws together and move them up and down.

She went through phases where she seemed to feel better and phases where her energy seemed low. She was very responsive to Reiki - for a long time, she would come right out on my lap and I would do hands-on Reiki with her. She would stretch out and really relax into it. Later on, when she wasn't feeling so well, she would stay in her cage, and I would hold my hands slightly off her and I would feel her connect with the Reiki energy and become very comfortable. Nearly always, afterwards she would want to eat, which was great, because it was hard for her to keep her appetite up. I would always mix different treats with her food to help to get her to eat.

I always looked forward to spending time with her, though at times I would become conscious that, though she had her better days and worse days, she did seem to be on a gradual downward slide, as her physical issues were taking their toll. Through it all, though, she maintained such a sweet, gentle spirit, as though to say to me, "hey, it's ok, don't worry about me." Above you see her giving me a kiss, after a Reiki session.

Right about the same time it became apparent that Animal's condition was deteriorating, it was apparent that Adele was reaching the time for her gentle exit. So, the same Thursday when I said goodbye to Animal, I also said goodbye to Adele.
I spent time with her twice while I was there, for a longer while when I first arrived, and a shorter time right before I left. She seemed to want to remain in her cage, as her energy was very low. So I reached in and offered her Reiki from just a short distance off her body. I felt such calm in her.

I told her it was ok to leave her body. I thanked her for teaching me so much, and thanked her for her gentle sweet spirit. I wanted her to know that she was not and would not be alone. I told her she would be surrounded by angels and light. I told her how loved she was.

Thanks to all the BARC people (staff, volunteers, veterinary folks, etc.) for all you did for her and for all you do for the animals every day.

I will miss you greatly Adele, and think of you often. A gentle hug to you, sweet lady.

Animal: R.I.P.

Sadly, we had to say farewell to two of the cats at BARC shelter in this past week, Animal and Adele. The shelter did everything they could to help these cats, giving them wonderful veterinary care as well as so much loving care from the BARC staff and volunteers. But their diminishing quality of life had come to the point where the kindest thing to do was to let them go. As each one of these cats was so special, I am doing a separate blog post for each.


Animal was a very shy but sweet little tortie cat who arrived last October, along with a number of other cats, after her owner had passed away. She was blind in one eye (and I'm not sure how well she saw with the other eye), had ongoing digestive issues (which they later thought was probably irritable bowel disease) and was very timid. The shelter gave her medication and special diet, and, though she was very shy, she got much care and attention from staff and volunteers.
Soon after she arrived at the shelter, a couple of the volunteers and I gave her and a few of her housemates a bath. This felt to me like the beginning of a real bond with her, as we washed and gently dried her.
I worked with her consistently, using the quietest of quiet energy, offering her both TTouch and Reiki, and little by little she grew to trust me and to recognize and respond to my touch. Sometimes she would initially start to run away, probably as her vision was not good, but once she felt my hands she would settle right down, literally settle herself in my hands. I felt her absorb and settle into Reiki with me, and then I would do gentle TTouches on her, and she would rub her face against my hand. She was so sweet and because of her coloration and petiteness, to me she looked like an adorable little bear. For a time she rallied, her coat becoming more smooth, and she gained some weight and would sometimes even get playful.

I found that the zigzag TTouch was especially comfortable for her, she would start rubbing against my hand and against her cage as I did this. She also found TTouches and strokes with the jelly scrubber to be soothing. And she grew to recognize the Reiki energy right away, and would settle right into it. I felt such a strong bond with this gentle little creature.

Then, they put her together in a cage with another kitty from her original household, Camilla (pictured below). These two grew closer the longer they were together. Camilla is also a petite little cat but of a quite different personality -- very outgoing and always ready to sit on someone's lap. I am quite bonded with her as well. Camilla was in tough condition when she arrived at the shelter but seems to be doing great now.



As Animal's health began to decline in the past weeks, Camilla showed Animal such kindness. When I opened their cage to offer Reiki to Animal, instead of Camilla wanting to sit on my lap at the same time (which was actually ok, I had one hand on her and one on Animal, sending Reiki to both), she cuddled in right next to Animal as I did the Reiki treatment. Camilla would snuggle up to Animal more and more as time passed. It felt like she knew exactly what was going on, and wanted to offer her comfort.
So when I went to the shelter last Thursday, I knew I could not be there on Friday and also knew it was quite possible that both Animal and Adele could be euthanized soon. So I said goodbye to both of them.

The goodbye with Animal was so sweet. She settled in to receive Reiki from me with my hands just a little off her. She had gotten increasingly frail, so it was more comfortable for her to receive the energy in a bit less intense way.

Camilla nestled in my arms and right next to Animal, like all three of us were part of the light and energy. I kept telling Animal it was ok to let go, that she was going to be with the angels, that she would be reunited with her owner, that she would be free. I told her she was very loved and she was very safe. I told would miss her so much, but that she could contact me any time (from the spirit world).

I felt some of her energy starting to go out and up, as though she was already beginning to transition. I felt very sad to be saying goodbye to her, but knew that it was the kindest thing for her to be let go.
Thank you Animal, for teaching me so much with your gentle, sweet spirit. and thank you to all the BARC staff, volunteers and veterinary folks for all your care for her and the rest of the animals at BARC.